my dear son

We see our kids everyday. We know them so well. But yet, sometimes, something just jumps out and slaps you in the face to say duh, they are growing up! Saturday was one of those times.

It was tax-free weekend (yay!) so we were out shopping for backpacks and shoes and all the other little things we need by next week. There were only character backpacks in this section. Jeff picked out a Spiderman3 backpack he wanted. I picked up a different one and said, "oh, here is a Transformers one, Jared." Then it happened. "No. I'm in middle school and that's for little kids."

He's been saying things lately like, "I'm ALMOST a teenager" and "I'm not a little kid anymore." I should have expected it to be the same with the backpack but somehow it just never occurred to me.

This is proving to be hard. Around here it has always been the 'big' kids and the 'little' boys. They were my sweet innocents while I dealt with the tumultuous teen years with the older two. And now that the older two are reaching adulthood, I should have been ready for this. But somehow I'm not. Part of me wants them to stay little and innocent. I think part of that stems from loosing the two after them. Partly it is just because I don't want to let go of my babies.

I'll let go. I will. It will be with some sadness, but I'll be fine. I know it's the way things are and are supposed to be. We found a backpack that he is happy to have. Middle School. It's almost like that first day of kindergarten. It's sad and even a little frightening but I know it's just another step. I'm happy for him. He is so totally excited. I feel that excitement, too. I'm looking forward to another school year full of excitement, learning, and yes, even growing.